If Their Lips Are Moving, They Are Lying!

Abusers lie, whether they be malignant narcissists or malignant borderlines or co morbid with each other. All cluster B personality…...

Abusers lie, whether they be malignant narcissists or malignant borderlines or co morbid with each other. All cluster B personality disordered abusers lie. They lie often. They lie convincingly and they often believe their own lies. Targets of abuse fall for the lies because we WANT desperately to believe the pretty words flowing from their lips. You can’t. You cannot believe a single thing the abuser says no matter how convincingly they say it. What you do want to do is look at the actions. Actions ALWAYS speak LOUDER than words. Always. An abuser may be able to give a convincing performance with words but how they act always gives them away. Believe the actions, not the words. If the words and actions do not match up there is your clue that they are lying. When caught in a lie they will say things like “Everybody lies!” Yes, non cluster B people do tend to do white lies, but not dark lies with malice a forethought that abusers have and non cluster B people do not lie frequently, or as convincingly and they do not believe their own lies. There is an actual moral compass in non cluster B people that is missing in Narcissists, Malignant Borderlines and Anti Social Personality disordered people. Non personality disordered people will own up to lying. A personality disordered abuser will become angry and defensive that you caught them in a lie and begin either a word salad rant or making excuses for why they had to lie or both. So, what can you do? Watch the behavior. Is lying a pattern for them? Does it come easy for them? Do they believe their own lies? Believe the behaviors, not the pretty, pretty words.

02-26-2023 The Ultimate Control

02-26-2023 The Ultimate Control

In this episode of We Need To Talk With Kris Godinez, Kris explains why dark triads decide to kill, either themselves or their families.

02-19-2023 Age Is Just A Number

02-19-2023 Age Is Just A Number

Have you ever wondered why disordered people delight in telling you that you CAN’T do the very thing you want to do? Have you ever wondered why age is such a big deal? Why abusers tend to discard their partners as they age and replace them with younger and younger partners? And what the heck is up with their fear of aging?

The first half of the show will discuss all of the above topics. The second half of the show Kris answers your questions about the above, and many more questions will be answered in this week’s We Need To Talk With Kris Godinez.

02-12-2023 B. E. T. R. A. Y. A. L

02-12-2023 B. E. T. R. A. Y. A. L

In this episode of We Need To Talk With Kris Godinez, Kris addresses the pain of betrayal trauma and how to effectively cope with the pain and the desire for revenge.  Kris also discusses how the trauma may be affecting current and future relationships. In the second half of the show, Kris answers questions from listeners.