I do but abusers don’t

Oh June! A beautiful month that is traditionally the marriage month. I hate to say it, but, red flags are…...
June 1, 2021

Oh June! A beautiful month that is traditionally the marriage month. I hate to say it, but, red
flags are usually flying long before the ink on the marriage license is dry. I cannot tell you the
number of horror stories where the love bombing stopped immediately after the vows and the
neglect, devalue and discard started, or worse the abuser took the wedding as an opportunity
to “hook up” with a bridesmaid or an old girlfriend almost daring someone to expose their
indiscretion/blatant abuse/betrayal. And it isn’t just a potential spouse you have to be aware
of. Let’s say you and your beloved are healthy and not disordered, but family members are. Be
aware that abusers LOVE to ruin important days, anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, and
especially weddings. You will see either the MIL or the mother of the bride act like it is HER
wedding, or the FIL or father of the bride will do inappropriate things like the toast and make it
all about them or how much they spent on this wedding or something inappropriate. So, what
to do? Pay attention to red flags whether they are from your beloved or your family or their
family. Make it CLEAR shenanigans will not be tolerated. You are under NO obligation to include
people you KNOW will sabotage your special day. If the family of origin, whether his or hers,
puts the “fun” in dysfunctional you would be wise to consider eloping. Yes, the ones who
wanted to cause drama will pitch a fit, but remember, this day is about you and your spouse (if
they are healthy) not about the drama seeking dysfunctional family of origin members. No is
your friend. Use it wisely, use it well, never ignore red flags.

Scary October!!

Scary October!!

Most people think the scariest thing about October is Halloween. In reality October is scary because it is the beginning of the hoover season. Between now and right after Valentine’s Day is when the emotional vampires attempt to feed. Abusers need constant...

Throwback Thursday: 11-14-2021 WHEN THE PARENT IS THE ENABLER

Throwback Thursday: 11-14-2021 WHEN THE PARENT IS THE ENABLER

It’s throwback Thursday, and we’ve got an episode from the archives for you from November 2021. In this episode of We Need To Talk With Kris Godinez, Kris talks about when a parent is the enabler to the abuser, why they do it, what to do and how to heal after getting away.

09-18-2022 Procrastination

09-18-2022 Procrastination

In this episode of We Need To Talk With Kris Godinez, Kris discusses why we procrastinate, what purpose it serves and how to break the habit of putting things off.